Drinking, the slippery slope!

Well, how about this for a first blog entry?

Since this is currently my issue I guess we’ll just have at it then.

Drinking and I have had quite the relationship since I began at…age 13. I know, same as you right? – me trying to feel better about all this. It has been, for the most part, a good relationship. I have had many good times but when it’s bad…man, thinking about it now it’s gotten bad quite a few times, eesh!

Throughout these many years of drinking I have been quite irresponsible. I know I’m in my early 20’s still and it can slide just a little, but I feel like for me personally and being the person I am I can do much better sometimes, many times….most times.

Let’s just say I have had some troubles in this department. Mostly because I feel like I am a better me with alcohol involved, haha! I mean, I enjoy being social and having fun, apart of me needs to be social, it keeps me going in a sense. But I get caught up in the fun and take one two many sometimes. I had been good about it for the past few months. I even attempted a whole month of not drinking, I cut myself some slack here and there and would have one drink. Okay, I didn’t make it the whole month, but I almost did so I am proud of that. I don’t necessarily check for perfectionism anyways, it’s not something I even aim for…seeing how everyone says nothing is perfect, then why aim for the unachievable – me trying to justify myself.

Anyways, like I was saying, I had been doing an okay job. Fell off the wagon just a couple times but I got right back up. But, let me tell you the last couple times I have just failed, miserably!

I feel like there’s a line and once it’s crossed, it’s bye Felicia for me. I pass that threshold and I take off. I also have been finding that what I like to drink, like the things I like the taste of (since I want to also enjoy my drink), is always the thing with the higher alcohol percentage. Like no chill! And maybe 5 of mine is 10 of the other persons. Why can’t I just have a few beers? What’s with it with the wine, champagne, dirty martinis, watermelon juice and vodkas (I can explain)…and other delicious cocktails I thoroughly enjoy!? It’s what I like, but it’s what definitely gets me over that line, real quick. And I am a small girl, over here drinking for like 3 people.

Point is, after the last two times that I have been out (which has been twice in one week), I have woken up in complete disappointment! Luckily I had no responsibilities those days which is partly why but I just, overdid it! Completely embarrassed myself in front of my family and that’s just not attractive, what are you doing child!? I don’t really need the pep talks right now either, I am my toughest critic. I have just been basking in disappointment, I got this one on my own.

The good news is, apparently I can be saved since I am aware my relationship with alcohol is unstable, and I can admit that. Therefore, I haven’t completely fallen off the deep end. Also, I am sorry to anyone who may have been harmed in the filming of the past two drunken stupers, I hope you all can still love me and possibly just forget all of that – me wishful thinking and I am also sorry to myself for being a mess. I am so very glad that no real damage has been done, I have never truly gotten into any real trouble. So before that happens…I have decided I will take charge of the situation, I have forgiven myself…I will set some limits and try my very best to be impeccable with my word.

This will not be the easiest thing for me, I love being social, I love to dance, I love to be with friends and I love drinks. Also, I live on island paradise where drinking is involved in pretty much everything. It’s in the lifestyle. But I know that if I want to get where I am going this is not the road to travel.

I know I am not the only one, and I think it is very okay to have fun and let loose, but I think setting some boundaries is the step I need to take here.

And the reason I am sharing this is because, well maybe I can let you feel a little bit better about yourself. You are not the only one screwing up!

It’s the start of a new week, let me try this again. #BeTheChange

PEACE!

 

 

 

*Oh, and people in the comment section, be nice…I’m delicate right now!

11 thoughts on “Drinking, the slippery slope!

  1. So easy to get caught up and lord knows I’m with you! I try to have one or two then switch it to the virgin version. Say no to shots, there’s always seemingly somthing to celebrate here too! I’m with ya all the way:) sometimes laughing so hard and glad I did, sometimes that morning shaking my head and palm to forehead emoji…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. ALWAYS something to celebrate! I agree, and really most times it is so much fun…it’s just those times where it goes a little too far that I’m trying not to get used to. We’re here after all to have fun while we’re at it, so I say cheers to drinking…a little more responsibly…hopefully! And to be kind to yourself when you don’t, probably needed that anyways lol!

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  2. I have been declining most invitations for the past few months because I know I just can’t help myself. the few times I DID go out, it’s been bad… So I get you completely, and I can tell you from experience of taking that step that it’s the best thing you can do. I got promoted at my job and got into grad school all because that nervous need for liquor got channelled into productivity. I started feeling better about myself too and started reaching for bigger goals. Anyway, all this to encourage you: You can do it, girl. I’m rooting for you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think just finding out a good balance is the key. Thanks for sharing, I do think we lose more than we gain when we take it so far. So it can only be beneficial! I just wanna make sure I am doing it in a healthy way and still have fun!! Thank you for your encouragement 💕💕

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  3. Take it from a 36-year-old who realizes that she needs to cut back or quit STAT or else she’ll destroy everything she holds precious to her, your catching on and self-awareness is inspiring. Right there with you…you got this. WE got this! xx

    Liked by 1 person

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